Falling in love with the wrong partner.

Being in a relationship with the wrong person can be so exhausting because only one person puts in his/his heart, time and energy. There’s nothing mutual and it is time wasting. “The wrong person” will cheat on you, lie to you, use you, he/she hardly calls, texts…you do all the calling all the time...

It takes a determined mind to come out of such relationship because it’s like a trap. “The wrong person” tends to be very manipulative and pretentious. They are very good story tellers, they hurt you so much, and they tell you stories like “I did that because I had a bad childhood”. They simply never take responsibility for their actions.

A times we ask ourselves why do people often stay in this kind of relationship? The answer would be... most people can’t just stand being alone, or they look for the wrong qualities in a partner, many people place so many priorities on good looks, power and material things. I believe there’s more to a person than a blue eyes, pink lips, cute smile, and working in a big company or having a fleet of car. 

We should learn to differentiate what we see in movies and read in novels, from reality…that’s why they are called make believe. The most important quality to look out for in a partner is –Personality. Personality encompasses a lot of what makes a person. Everyone will grow old physically, but a great personality will remain unchanged with age.

   

  In addition, some people continue dating the wrong person thinking they can change the person. No man has the ability to change another person, only God can work in a man’s life, heart and completely change the person. Therefore people should stop wasting their time  in a fruitless relationship thinking they can change their partners.

I believe if you love yourself, know your worth and know that you deserve better. You wouldn’t date or continue dating someone that tosses you around and treats you anyhow. Love makes the world go round, but it all begins with you. If you want others to treat you well, treat yourself well first. If you seek love from another, fall in love with yourself first.

It is beautiful to fall in love but it is amazing to fall for the right person. Cheers and all the best!!

Tips on Geographically Challenged Relationship

 Ever been in a long distance relationship?  I still remember the day I met him like it was yesterday. It's one of the most pleasurable and dear memories my mind has ever encountered to date. I like to think of it as the day my life began, but that time came for us being geographically challenged!!! God it wasn't easy.....

 Here are some ideas to help keep that long-distance romance alive.

1. Planning is very important in a relationship like this, and both parties must respect this. You and your partner will want to prioritize time with one another, but that will only be possible if carefully planned as much in advance as possible.

2. It is crucial that you are both realistic about what can or cannot be achieved. Make a commitment to each other about what you can or will do and then stick to it. If something else crops up, then always advise one another, but don't get upset if you can't speak at an agreed time due to an unexpected event. Life has a habit of throwing you the unexpected!

3. Long-distance relationships sometimes have a tendency to dwell on the extraordinary. There can be a pressure to do something exciting every time you see each other. Talk about the normal, everyday things that you do and make sure that your meetings frequently dwell upon the ordinary. Don't expect one another to make extra efforts because you live a long way apart. It will put pressure on your romance.

4. Honesty is vital too. If you are feeling down and lonely, then tell your partner. If you are concerned that the relationship simply isn't working, then talk about it. If you are out with your friends, then let your partner know what you are doing. Long-distance relationships sometimes produce anxieties and trust issues because one partner has no idea about what the other is doing. That doesn't mean you have to clock in every half-hour, but maintaining a dialogue about your life is vital.

5. Value your friends more than ever. They will be the social network that will see you through the low periods when you really miss your partner. Your friendships will help you maintain perspective. They will provide shoulders to cry on and a social life that will stop you from feeling as though you are putting your life on hold. Remember that your friends don't need to approve of what you are doing. They just need to be honest and supportive.

6. Don't be frightened to plan for the future. As time goes on, your relationship may become more and more serious. Your romance will be buoyed by plans for the future, so feel free to think and talk about the future. There may be a time when the two of you will be closer together again, or where your romance is less affected by the distance. Everybody needs something to look forward to, so don't deny yourself this.

7. Make the distance work for you. Long-distance relationships can be hard, but the distance can work in your favour. It means that you can share different experiences from your local neighbourhoods. It also means that you can be united by the smallest, most romantic things. If you can both look up and see the same star constellation, then suddenly you won't feel quite so far apart.

Nobody said that a long-distance relationship would be easy. With hard work and commitment, however, there is no reason that two people cannot be in love regardless of how many miles separate them physically.

Also being geographically challenged doesn't mean you're unlucky in love....Mmmmmh though watching your partner leave is such sweet sorrow!!!

The Early Furahiday ( Thursday)

Thursday night in Nairobi is by all standards the real Furahiday night experience. Most clubs are open all week long but really come a live then, when majority of Nairobians come to let loose and usher in the weekend.

Jana (Thursday) all roads led to Choices Baricho Rd, as they hosted the Professor of Benganology, Dan Chizi Aceda. I swear it was a night full of original Acoustic, Jazz & Roots. I was amused by the fact that there was no cover charge and their beers are at a pocket friendly price of Ksh. 150/= . This made it easier for  me to drag along a friend as she was attracted by the beer....... isn't it wonderful?

The Professor started his performance on time and you could tell how patrons loved his performance, they were really thrilled!! come next week if he is gonna be on the venue  am ain't missing it and I take the chance to welcome you if you are the type of live African music.

So if you ever get stuck in traffic on Uhuru Highway around Baricho Rd just stopby and enjoy an ice-cold beer!!

Wednesday's Night Out

A friend calls you on a Wednesday evening and says wanna hang out? and without giving it a second thought agrees before she changes her mind coz at the time you really needed company as you wait for your other friend  traveling to Kampala from Coast to pass on some stuff.

We agreed to meet at Jazz as we decide the next venue. Here we ordered our classy drink which is King fisher...since a times we settle on Tusker or Pilsner. After two to three drinks the friends arrives and we rush to Coast Bus offices to pass on the goodies.

Here we spent a few minutes catching up then decided to head to Scratch a pub located in Moi Avenue its usually Karaoke Night. We enjoy Various performances as we continue sipping the said classy drink.....a famous artist performed (Fred Omondi)  who really jazed my friend, she wanted a photo with him unfortunately this didn't happen reason being... mmmh that gonna be a storo for another day.

Around midnight we decided to head for a bend ova night at Tacos Club in Kimathi Street, talk of swaggarific!! this is where young gurls compete, so anytime u feel bend ova madness could work for you then this is the place to be as it is usually more than crazy.Thot this was over in Nai but here I was for an explosive night of serious madness riddim and I swear I LOVED it!!

NIGHT LIFE IN NAIROBI

Nairobi character changes after the sun goes down as many Kenyans rush to their favorite joints to enjoy many interesting sights, sounds and entertainment. The city has a thriving nightlife scene that caters to a young hip crowd, expats and adventurous tourists a like.

So the next time you find yourself in Nairobi, even if you are just there on a layover, do not miss out on the city’s spirited night life. It is the thriving part of Nairobi’s culture.

The selection of the venue is based on the genre of music and theme of the night.

To gear you up for a 'Nairobi night' treat to remember, you may want to know one, two or more things about the Nairobian’s clubbing culture. For starters, clubs in Nairobi open as early as 5pm on weekdays and as from 2pm on weekends till 2300hrs as per Mututho law, which stipulates that if anyone is caught in a pub drinking past that time, faces arrest and the penalty is Ksh 30,000 fine or a six-month imprisonment.

But no, the scenario is completely opposite. Bars are packed to the full with people drowning themselves into bottles of alcohol.

The noise from the bars is massive as disc jockeys keep revelers on the dance floor.

The scenes are the same in estate pubs popularly referred to as ‘locals’, especially in Westlands, Hurlingham, Nairobi West, Langata, Zimmerman and Eastlands.

This goes on until the early hours of the following day when intoxicated men and women stagger out of bars as late as 6am.

It is business as usual as the Alcoholic Drinks Control Act 2010, which is named after its author, Naivasha MP John Mututho, remains in limbo. Now you know about the Muthutho law.

In no time what may have been appeared like small business meetings to a stranger eventually transform into groups of 8 sometimes 15 people hanging out together and having fun. At this stage the dominant activity is drinking, catching up with the hottest gossip in town.

Pretty much like a locomotive’s engine the evening picks slowly before hitting the temple at around midnight or thereabout. By then, the clubbers have begun to feel the effects of their alcohol and are ready to leave the lounges that they started off at and go to the night clubs whose surroundings promise louder music and a more boisterous activity.

Did I mention that Nairobians are notorious club-hoppers? As such it is quite unlikely that they will end the night in the club that they started off in. This can explain why you could be in a somewhat empty club at a certain time only to see it fill up at one go and empty at another.

Also, Nairobians tend to move in crowds determined by the social status they ascribe to. You are therefore likely to see the same crowd at different hang-outs more than once if you too decide to club-hop.

You are also likely to notice that most clubs in Nairobi are not too distinctly different from each other. Generally they tend to play the same genre of music, more often. The main differences with the clubs, however is on the size, décor and the price of drinks.

You will also find that Kenyans are very proud of their local drinks particularly the '"summit" and “Tusker”. However, while these will be the main features on their tables there are those who prefer straight shots.

Depending on the day you land in Nairobi, you are spoilt for choices as to where to go. As for me if I want to know what’s happening where, I like using event service for SMS 3707, for more info you can log onto www.sms3707.com if you don’t mind, Jeez they have incredible services, talk of technology!!.

My favorite joint is Florida 2000 “F2” sometimes know as sleazy, this sexy night club draws expats and locals from all over, and is one of the oldest clubs best known for absolutely stunning Kenyan girls mixing with not so 'beautiful' older western men!

The club open’s at 9pm, there is a small entrance fee currently Ksh 250/=, per person. Kenyans starts popping in as from 5pm, I asked around why so, but I realized its free entrance before 9pm. Then I agreed with Heartstrings Kenya on their recent play titled TheGoodTheBadTheKenyan where they stated that only Kenyans are late for church, work, funeral and everything else EXCEPT when disco is free before 9pm, next time they have a play make a date with them and I promise you, you won’t regret!!!

F2’s Major events starts on Wednesday where they usually have a Soul Night and If you enjoy entertaining others as you have fun “F2” is where you want to be on a Thursday Night. It is Karaoke Night hosted by Calif Divas. With the likes of akina Kendi around, I swear it can’t get better after a long day at work.

Friday is Rhumba Night with DJ Marto for Radio Maisha. F2 incorporates everyone on their schedule as they have a Jam Session for young generation on Sundays from 2pm till 5pm and later in the night they have Reggae hosted by Dohty family.

Since you can’t party in an empty stomach “F2” takes care of that, there is nyama choma food available and continental cuisine, all from Choma Cave Restaurant.

Affiliated clubs and entertainment venues are New Florida “F1” (Madhouse) – The New Florida Sometimes known as Madhouse or Madi, is found in Koinange Street. Here you enjoy Soul, Salsa, Techno Mania and Reggae on their respective days. “F1” is usually open as from 6pm but the charges starts as from 8pm which is currently Ksh 300/=.

There is also “F3” Pango – which is the latest addition to the Florida Group, and is pure adult entertainment, with live dancers every night of the week. Lastly there is the Florida Night Club and Casino, Mombasa, for those who might to explore at the country's Coastal region.